1. |
Nancy Boy
03:58
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I tried hiding in a fishbowl
Was caught in netting, and seen by the world
So, I broke out and I evolved
Into a dragon and sharpened my claws
It didn’t help that I was firstborn
And thought the father some kind of warlord
After a fistful of bad metaphors
I knew I didn’t belong
But am I also not made in the image of God
Bleary-eyed and red-faced, master of macabre
I may be wrong but I’m not Dorian
Just beat from scripture beaten aphorisms
Take it with a pinch of salt and Basil
Androgyny as a conscious placebo
The cracks in the bleachers bleed crepuscular
And, It Is Well With My Soul
But under the cold light of a projector
I lost all self-control
So how should I interpret Verse 28
As an elephant-skinned reprobate
And just because I call God by a different name
Doesn’t mean that I don’t know grace
And just because I’m not bedside on my knees
Doesn’t mean I don’t pray
And, “Can’t you feel more religious”
I’m doing the best I can
But what if purpose is relative
And there’s no master plan
So, I tattooed my sleeves like a Nancy boy
With anthropomorphic bullshit and burdens past
And I don’t understand why
But everyone always asks
But I fucking hate
Explaining their meaning
It’s all so self-deprecating
And I don’t expect you to get it
It’s just how I am
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2. |
Milk & Honey
03:32
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Sometimes I drink milk and honey
To help me fall asleep
I like the taste and the warm feeling that it brings
But there’s a reason, I’ll admit
It’s not because of some covenant
There’s a space in my head with a voice that says
“You’re better off dead”
But I’ve been told that I’m gracious host
So would you feel more at home
With milk and honey
Or whiskey and coke
It’s like the static from an old screen
Only reaching public access TV
I wanna turn it off but there’s nothing else to watch
So I’m left alone to fend with my thoughts
But the more I listen
The more I understand
Happiness is a warm gun getting cold in my hand
But I’ve been told that I’m a cordial host
So would you be more comfortable
In the back of my throat
Or up against my temple
It’s not that I don’t love you all
And it’s not that I’m not grateful
I swear, I’m not being selfish
But I just can’t seem to forget
When I was beat in a mall parking lot
It was cold and dead and called love
I was told I would never see God
I’m just tired of trying to prove that wrong
Grace shouldn’t be this hard fought
I guess you could call it giving up
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3. |
Solvitur Ambulando
02:50
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Fuck, okay
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4. |
Birdsong - Acoustic
03:35
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I’m wide awake, yeah, it’s morning
I didn’t always rise so early
But there’s something in the trees and she’s new and I never want her to leave
She’s foreign, yet familiar
In a language alien but in my heart she’s made a home
And all want is for her to echo back, “it’s with you I belong”
She’s a birdsong
She’s a birdsong
The sun could rise a thousand times
In a thousand different shades and in a thousand different ways
But believe me when I say it couldn’t nearly match the likeness of her
All else seems cold and dead
Anytime she comes around I take in as much as I can
And I don’t Christ could ever understand what her sort of beauty does to a man
She’s a birdsong
She’s a birdsong
I’m wide awake, yeah, it’s morning
I’ve seen a thousand different shades and in a thousand different ways
And I don’t think even a second coming of Christ could bring as much beauty into the world
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